Think back to when you were in kindergarten, when everyone was friends with everyone. In kindergarten, the only thing that mattered was having a good time and having good snacks for snack break. The life of a child was always active, always changing and completely carefree.
Moving into elementary and middle school, children start to define who they are and what they value. During these times, friend groups start to form along with certain requirements to be within a particular friend group. If you were cool enough, pretty enough or athletic enough, you made it into a certain friend group. If you weren’t enough, you were not included.
Unfortunately, this behavior persists through high school years. Cliques and possés ruled the school, and if you weren’t included in a friend group, you were cast aside without any friends.
Everyone has struggled with feeling excluded at some point in time. Whether you were including someone or you were excluding someone, inclusion plays a big role in every single person’s life.
Some of the most important moments in students’ lives are in college. Here, some of the friends one makes will stick with them for the rest of their lives. It’s important as a college community to make others feel included in most everything we do because the memories that are made in college are the ones that matter the most.
Recently, I got to listen to some other students’ opinions about how inclusive they think other people are. Every single person felt some level of being left out.
Granted, it is early in the school year and newcomers are still figuring college out and finding their place here. College can be a completely new atmosphere, with a lot more responsibilities. While these responsibilities may be a lot to handle, making friends is one of the most important steps. Friendships help in times of trouble, times of celebration and times when you accidentally fall asleep during class and you have no idea what was discussed.
While new students are in a completely new atmosphere, there are things that other people can do to make students feel included. Being friendly to others is the first step. Smiling and saying “hello” to someone can go a long way. When you see someone sitting by themselves, whether that means in the classroom or at dinner, invite them to sit with you and spark up a conversation. At CAB events, break away from your normal group and get to know other people. Creating new friendships is never a bad thing.
We are unable to go back to simpler times in kindergarten, but inclusion can bring out friendships that can make us feel like kids again.